stephen lynch - gerbil #

tagged unplugged, acoustic, funny

LYRICS
I bought a gerbil
At the petting zoo
If Richard Gere can do it
I can too
I get undressed
I start to lube
I stick a gerbil at the end of the tube
Wondering just how he'll feel
Will he like it better than his little wheel
Careful now he's right beside me
One more inch and he's inside me

Go gerbil go
Burrow harder, burrow deeper
Be my little chimney sweeper
One thing i forgot about
How am i supposed to get you out?

So now my gerbil's on easy street
It's warm and cozy and theres plenty to eat
The situation is beyond my control
Got to find a way to get him out of his hole
I tried crowbars i tried wires
I almost had him with a pair of plyers
I tried cheese but he's not biting
I wish this wasn't so exciting

Go gerbil go
Jesus, I am such a sucker
Please get out you furry f---
I think I am getting ill
Suddenly he is very very still

Now its too late
My gerbil died
I guess I have committed gerbicide
Here's some advice its very clear cut
If you love your gerbil
Don't stick him up your butt
Don't stick him up your butt
Little furry gerbil in your booty hole